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1、英文幽默故事:Therewasaguywhowentintoashoptobuyaparrot.Therewerethreeparrotsintheshop.Onewas$5,000;anotherone,$10,000;andthethirdone,$30,000.Thecustomeraskedtheowner,“Howcomethisguyis$5,000?That’ssoexpensiveforthiskindofparrot.”Theownersaid,“BecauseIhavetrainedhimandhecanta
2、lk.”Sothecustomeraskedhim,“Howaboutthisguy?Whatcanhedothatmakeshimsoexpensive?”Theownersaid,“Well,apartfromtalking,hecanalsodosomeamusingactions,likedancingandsoon.That’swhyhe’ssoexpensive.”Thenthecustomersaid,“Howaboutthethirdone?Whatcanhedothatmakeshimsoexpensive?”
3、Theowneroftheshopsaid,“Idon’tknow.Normally,Ihaveneverheardhimtalk,nordance,norwhistle,norsing,nothingatall!Buttheothertwocallhim‘TheBoss.’”老板最大有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。店里有三只鹦鹉,其中一只卖五千元,另一只卖一万元,还有一只卖三万元。顾客问老板:「为什么这只要卖五千元?这个价钱对这种鹦鹉来说太贵了!」老板说:「因为我有训练他讲话。」顾客又问:「那这只呢?他会做什么?为什么要卖这么贵?」老
4、板说:「他除了会说话之外,还会表演一些有趣的动作,好比说跳舞等等,所以才卖这么贵。」顾客接着又问:「那第三只呢?他会做什么?为什么要卖这么贵?」老板说:「我不知道。我从没听过他讲话、吹口哨或唱歌,也没看过他跳舞,什么都没有!不过另外两只叫他:『老板!』」Whereistheegg?Teacher:Canyoumakeasentencewiththeword"egg"?Student:Yes.Iateapieceofcakeyesterday.Teacher:Thenwhereisthe“egg"?Student:Inthecak
5、e,Sir.鸡蛋在哪里?老师:你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗?学生:可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。老师:“鸡蛋”在哪?学生:在蛋糕里,先生Tomisalittleboy,andheisonlysevenyearsold.Oncehegoestoacinema.Itisthefirsttimeforhimtodothat.Hebuysaticketandgoesin.Butaftertwoorthreeminuteshecomesout,andbuysthesecondticketandgoesinagain.Afterafewminute
6、shecomesoutagainandbuysthethirdticket.Twoorthreeminutesafterthathecomesoutandasksforanotherticket.Butagirlaskshim,“Whydoyoubuysomanytickets?Howmanyfriendsdoyoumeet?”“No,Ihavenofriendshere,butabigwomanalwaysstopsmeatthedoorandcutsupmyticket.”52汤姆是个小孩,他才7岁。当他去电影院的时候。那时
7、他第一次去。他买了张票进去了。但没过两三分钟他就出来了,然后买了第二张票又进去了。几分钟后他又出来买了第三张票。接着两三分钟后他又出来买票。一个女的问她,“你为什么要买那么多票啊?你见到了几个朋友?""没有,我里面没朋友,但是每当我进门的时候一位大的女人老把我的票给剪了"Child:Myunclehas1000menunderhim.Man:Heisreallysomebody.Whatdoesdo?Child:Amaintenancemaninacemetery他真是一个大人物小孩:我叔叔下面有1000个人。男人:他真是一个大
8、人物。他是干什么的?小孩:墓地守墓人。Teacher:WouldShakespearebeagreatmanifhewerestillalivetoday?Student:Ofcourse.Hemustbeagreatman,forsofarnobodyhasl