英文已如此搞笑,翻译却更加残暴

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1、英文已如此搞笑,翻译却更加残暴.txt23让我们挥起沉重的铁锤吧！每一下都砸在最稚嫩的部位，当青春逝去，那些部位将生出厚晒太阳的茧，最终成为坚实的石，支撑起我们不再年轻但一定美丽的生命。杞笘-寮€蹇冪綉棣栭〉鎴戠殑棣栭〉鎴戠殑棣栭〉棰勮锛?濂藉弸璁块棶鏃堕檶鐢熶汉璁块棶鏃跺ソ鍙嬫垜鐨勫叏閮ㄥソ鍙嬪ソ鍙嬬鐞?閭€璇锋湅鍙嬪姞鍏ユ煡鎵炬湅鍙?鎴戝姞鐨勬満鏋勬垜鍔犵殑鍚嶄汉鍏ㄩ儴鏈烘瀯鍚嶄汉缇ゆ垜鐨勭兢濂藉弸鐨勭兢鍒涘缓鏂扮兢鍏ㄩ儴缇ゆ秷鎭煭娑堟伅绯荤粺娑堟伅璇勮璇勮鍥炲鐣欒█鏉跨暀瑷€

2、鍥炲閭€璇封攰鎵句汉鈹婅缃?璐︽埛璁剧疆闅愮璁剧疆缁勪欢璁剧疆鏀粯涓績鈹婇€€鍑?鐓х墖鏃ヨ璁板綍璁拌处鏈嬪弸涔板崠涔版埧瀛?浜夎溅浣?铏氭嫙鏈嬪弸鍚镐箰鏃犵┓绀肩墿闈炲父绀奸亣瓒宠抗鐢靛奖杞笘鍔ㄤ粬涓€涓?闊充箰缃戠洏鐪熷績璇?閽撻奔鐐瑰嚮杩欓噷锛屾坊鍔犲悇绉嶅疄鐢ㄦ垨娓告垙缁勪欢娣诲姞缁勪欢缁勪欢璁剧疆鏋楀瓙鐨勮浆甯?濂圭殑棣栭〉鈹?濂圭殑杞笘<<杩斿洖涓婁竴椤电2/2472甯?鈹?杩斿洖濂圭殑杞笘<<涓婁竴甯栥€€涓嬩竴甯?>鑻辨枃宸插姝ゆ悶绗戯紝缈昏瘧鍗存洿鍔犳畫鏆

3、?鍙戦€佺粰濂藉弸鈹?鏉冮檺鈹?鍒犻櫎璇ヨ浆甯栦粎浣犺嚜宸卞彲瑙?璇ヨ浆甯栦綘鐨勫ソ鍙嬮兘鑳界湅瑙?銆両askedGodforabike,butIknowGoddoesn'tworkthatway.SoIstoleabikeandaskedforforgiveness.寮€濮嬫垜鐩存帴姹備笂甯濊祼杈嗚嚜琛岃溅銆?鍚庢潵鎴戠悽纾ㄤ笂甯濆姙浜嬪効涓嶆槸杩欎釜璺暟銆?浜庢槸鑰佸瓙鍋蜂簡涓€杈嗙劧鍚庢眰涓婂笣瀹芥仌銆?2銆両wanttodiepeacefullyinmysleep,likemygran

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5、赴瀵岀殑缁忛獙鎵撹触浣?4銆乀helastthingIwanttodoishurtyou.Butit'sstillonthelist.鐩磋瘧锛氬湪杩欎釜涓栫晫涓?鎴戞渶涓嶆効鎰忓仛鐨勪簨灏辨槸浼ゅ浣?浣嗘槸杩欎欢浜嬩粛鍦ㄦ垜鐨勮€冭檻涔嬪垪銆?鎰忚瘧a锛氭垜鐪熶笉鎯充激瀹充綘锛屼絾浣犱篃鍒€兼垜銆?鎰忚瘧b锛氬惥铏戒笉鏉€浼粊锛屼集浠佺敱鎴戣€屾銆?5銆両fsexisapainintheass,thenyou'redoingitwrong...a.濡傝鍢垮捇涔冨眮鐪间笉鑳芥壙鍙椾箣鐥涳

6、紝閭ｆ槸浣犳搷閿欐礊...b.鑻XOO鏄笅浣撶殑鐥涳紝閭ｄ箞锛屾槸浣犳搷閿欍€?6銆乀heearlybirdmightgettheworm,butthesecondmousegetsthecheese.a.鏃╄捣婊村皬楦熸湁铏櫕锛佹櫄鍒扮殑鑰侀紶鏈夊ザ閰紒b.鏃╄捣鐨勯笩鍎挎湁铏悆锛屾棭璧风殑铏効琚笩鍚冦€?7銆乄eliveinasocietywherepizzagetstoyourhousebeforethepolice.鍦ㄥ挶浠繖鍣跺搾閫佸鍗栫殑閮芥瘮璀﹀療鏉ョ殑蹇?8銆丠

7、avingsexislikeplayingbridge.Ifyoudon'thaveagoodpartner,you'dbetterhaveagoodhand.XXOO灏辫薄鎵撴ˉ鐗屻€?濡傛灉瀵规墜涓嶅ソ浣匡紝鑷繁鐨勬墜蹇呴』濂戒娇銆?9銆?SomepeoplearelikeSlinkies...notreallygoodforanything,butyoucan'thelpsmilingwhenyouseeonetumbledownthestairs.鏈変簺浜哄氨鍍?Slinkies锛堝脊

8、绨х帺鍏凤級锛屾病浠€涔堝疄鍦ㄧ敤澶勶紝浣嗙湅浠栦滑鍦ㄦゼ姊笂鍊掕吘鏉ユ崳鑵惧幓杩樻槸寰堟湁鍠滄劅銆?10銆丳oliticiansanddiapershaveonethingincommon.Theyshouldbothbechangedregularly,andforthesamereason.鏀垮鍜岀焊灏垮竷鏈変竴涓叡鍚岀偣灏辨槸锛氫粬浠兘寰堟湁瑙勫緥鍦拌鏇挎崲锛岃€屼笖鍥犱负鍚屼竴涓悊鐢扁€斺€旇剰浜嗭紒锛?11銆乄ardoesnotdeterminewhoisright-on