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1、TheBigBangTheoryScriptSeason1byChuckLorre&BillPradyEpisode1Pilot**********************************SHELDONSoifaphotonisdirectedthroughaplanewithtwoslitsinitandeitherslitisobserved,itwillnotgothroughbothslits.Ifit'sunobserved,itwill.However,ifit'sobservedaft
2、erit'slefttheplanebutbeforeithitsitstarget,itwon'thavegonethroughbothslits.LEONARDAgreed.What'syourpoint?SHELDONThere'snopoint,Ijustthinkit'sagoodideaforaT-shirt.LEONARDExcuseme.ALTHEAHangon.LEONARDOneacrossis“Aegean”.Eightdownis“Nabokov”.26acrossis“MCM”.1
3、4downis...Moveyourfinger...“Phylum”whichmakes14across“Port-au-Prince”.See,“PapaDoc'scapitolidea”,that's“Port-au-Prince”.Haiti.ALTHEACanIhelpyou?LEONARDYes.Um,isthisthehigh-IQspermbank?ALTHEAIfyouhavetoask,maybeyoushouldn'tbehere.SHELDONIthinkthisistheplace
4、.ALTHEAFilltheseout.LEONARDThankyou.We'llberightback.ALTHEAOh,takeyourtime.I'lljustfinishmycrosswordpuzzle.Oh,wait.SHELDONLeonard,Idon'tthinkIcandothis.LEONARDWhat,areyoukidding?You'reasemi-pro.SHELDONNo.Wearecommittinggeneticfraud.There'snoguaranteethatou
5、rspermisgoingtogeneratehigh-IQoffspring.Thinkaboutthat.IhaveasisterwiththesamebasicDNAmixwhohostessesatFuddruckers.LEONARDSheldon,thiswasyouridea.AlittleextramoneytogetfractionalT1bandwidthintheapartment.SHELDONIknow,andIdoyearnforfasterdownloads.Butthere'
6、ssomepoorwomanwho'sgonnapinherhopesonmysperm.Whatifshewindsupwithatoddlerwhodoesn'tknowifheshoulduseanintegraloradifferentialtosolvetheareaunderacurve?LEONARDI'msureshe'llstilllovehim.SHELDONIwouldn't.LEONARDWell,whatdoyouwanttodo?SHELDONIwanttoleave.LEONA
7、RDOkay.SHELDONWhat'stheprotocolforleaving?LEONARDIdon'tknow.I'veneverrenegedonaprofferofspermbefore.SHELDONLet'stryjustwalkingout.LEONARDOkay.ALTHEABye.SHELDON,LEONARDBye.LEONARDNicemeetingyou.SHELDONAreyoustillmadaboutthespermbank?LEONARDNo.SHELDONYouwann
8、ahearaninterestingthingaboutstairs?LEONARDNotreally.SHELDONIftheheightofasinglestepisoffbyaslittleastwomillimeters,mostpeoplewilltrip.LEONARDIdon'tcare.Twomillime...?Thatdoesn'tseemright.SHELDONNo,it'strue,Id
