英语jokes 十二星座

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1、jokesHowmuchEnglishcanyouspeak"YourHonor,Iwanttobringtoyourattentionhowunfairitisformyclienttobeaccusedoftheft.HearrivedinNewYorkCityaweekagoandbarelyknewhiswayaround.What'smore,heonlyspeaksafewwordsofEnglish."Thejudgelookedatthedefendantandasked,"HowmuchEnglishc

2、anyouspeak?"Thedefendantlookedupandsaid,"Givemeyourwallet!""法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。而且，他只会说几个英语单词。"法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文？"被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我！"中文翻译Ahusband,provingtohiswifethatwomentalkmorethanmen,showedherastudywhichindicatedthatmenuseonaverageonly15

3、000wordsaday,whereaswomenuse30000wordsaday.Shethoughtaboutthisforawhileandthentoldherhusbandthatwomenusetwiceasmanywordsasmenbecausetheyhavetorepeateverythingtheysay.Hesaid,"What?"丈夫给妻子看了一项调查结果，为了向她证明女人比男人啰嗦。研究表明男人平均每天使用15000个字，而女人每天使用30000个。妻子想了一会儿说，女人每天说的字数是男人的

4、两倍，因为她们必须重复已经说过的话。他问："什么？"Aguysaystohisfriend,"GuesshowmanycoinsIhaveinmypocket."Thefriendssays,"IfIguessright,willyougivemeoneofthem?"Thefirstguyssays,"Ifyouguessright,I'llgiveyoubothofthem!"路人甲对路人乙说，"猜猜我兜里有几个子儿？"路人乙说："我猜对了，你能给我一个不？"路人甲说："你要猜对了，我两个全部给你！"Dad:Tom,

5、pleasetellme,whichmonthhas28days?Tom:Everymonth.爸爸：告诉我汤姆，哪个月有28天呢？汤姆：每个月都有啊！Boy:Isthisseatempty?Girl:Yes,andthisonewillbeifyousitdown.男孩：这个座位是空的么？女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也将是空的。Oneshouldloveanimals.Theyaresotasty.每个人都应该热爱动物,因为它们很好吃."Yourfuturedependsonyourdreams."Sogotosl

6、eep."现在的梦想决定着你的将来",所以还是再睡一会吧.Thankyou