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1、搞笑英语话剧剧本《荆珂刺秦王》旁白(Aside)/介绍(Introduction):Longagotherewasacrazycountry,inthiscrazycountrythereweresomecrazypeople,tryingtoshowthecrazyhistorybycrazyways.MrJingkewasthemostfamoussword 搞笑英语话剧剧本《荆珂刺秦王》旁白(Aside)/介绍(Introduction):Longagotherewasacrazycountry,inthiscrazycountrythereweresomecrazy
2、people,tryingtoshowthecrazyhistorybycrazyways.MrJingkewasthemostfamousswordsman剑客andwassenttokillkingofQing,“Yingzheng”.Butfinallyhefailed.Doyouwanttoknowwhathappenedatthattime?Okay,nextshowwilltellyouthetruth.ActionI太子丹(上,掏出镜子梳头,做自恋状):Mirror,mirror,tellme,whoisthemostprettymanintheworld?(画外音:It’sy
3、ou,PrinceDan!太子丹高兴状)Thankumirror!(面对观众)I’mPrinceDan,themagicmirrorsaidIamthemostattractivemanintheworld.ButYingZhengisajealousguy,Ifeelhewillkillmeifmirrortoldhimthetruth.Iamsoscared.SowhatcanIdo?(向幕里大叫)Whereismyminister?阿三(毕恭毕敬):Honey,Iamcoming.太子丹:I’vetoldyouagainandagainthatyoushouldcallme“mymos
4、tbeautiful、graceful、handsome、charming、cute、smartanddearestPrinceDan”!阿三:Sure,honey!Ihaveagoodidea.WecanfindaherotokillYingZheng~~~(作杀状)太子:Ohyeah~~~.Whatisthemostexpensivecommodityinthiscentury?Talent!(二十一世纪最需要的是什么,人才!然后拍阿三肩膀,做赞许状)Goodidea!Butwhoistherightcandidate?阿三:AfterscreeningIhavetwopromising
5、personsonhand.OneisMissLiMoChou,theotherisMrJinKe.TomorrowtheywillPKfortheNO1killeroftheworld.太子:Well,showmethewinnerassoonaspossible,OK?阿三:Yes.ActionII(《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐)荆轲AreyouLimochou?李莫愁Yes.荆轲OK.I’mJingke,youknow,IwillletyouknowIamthekingofthekillers’world.李莫愁Areyouchallengingme?荆轲Offcourse
6、!耸耸肩表示同意莫愁Comeon!音乐起两人冲上前来“人在江湖漂啊,哪有不挨刀啊,一刀砍死你啊,两刀砍死你啊。。。。”李莫愁倒地荆轲大笑李莫愁痛苦状:Whathappened?Whyaren’tyouhurt?荆轲:Wedon'tneedanyreasontowinaperson.Don'twe?Dowe?(赢一个人需要理由么,不需要么,需要么?)李莫愁:Mommaalwayssaid:"Lifeislikeaboxofchocolates,Mochou.Youneverknowwhatyou'regonnaget."Igotit,Mommaisright.轲再次大笑太子丹上(抱拳):How
7、areyou?荆柯:Fine,thankyou,andyou?太子丹:OhmyGod!Couldyougivemeaninnovativeanswerto“Howareyou”?荆柯:Sure!太子丹:Howareyou?荆柯:Fine,thankyou,andyourwife?太子丹晕倒荆柯:Hey,man,I’mkidding!太子丹:Oh,I’mkiddingtoo!(毕恭毕敬)MayIhaveyour