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1、Unit3:SectionAMarriageAcrosstheNationsIntensiveStudyMarriageAcrosstheNations1GailandIimaginedaquietwedding.Duringourtwoyearstogetherwehadexperiencedtheusualupsanddownsofacouplelearningtoknow,understand,andrespecteachother.Butthroughitallwehadhonestlyconfrontedtheweaknessesandstrengthsofeacho
2、ther’scharacters.2Ourracialandculturaldifferencesenhancedourrelationshipandtaughtusagreatdealabouttolerance,compromise,andbeingopenwitheachother.GailsometimeswonderedwhyIandotherblacksweresoinvolvedwiththeracialissue,andIwassurprisedthatsheseemedtoforgetthesubtlerformsofracialhatredinAmerica
3、nsociety.IntensiveStudy3GailandIhadnoillusionsaboutwhatthefutureheldforusasamarried,mixedcoupleinAmerica.Thecontinualsourceofourstrengthwasourmutualtrustandrespect.4Wewantedtoavoidthemistakemadebymanycouplesofmarryingforthewrongreasons,andonlyfindingoutten,twenty,orthirtyyearslaterthattheywe
4、reincompatible,thattheyhardlytookthetimetoknoweachother,thattheyoverlookedseriouspersonalityconflictsintheexpectationthatmarriagewasanautomaticwaytomakeeverythingworkoutright.ThatpointwasemphasizedbythefactthatGail’sparents,afterthirty-fiveyearsofmarriage,weregoingthroughabitterandpainfuldiv
5、orce,whichhaddestroyedGailandforatimehadanegativeeffectonourbuddingrelationship.IntensiveStudy5WhenGailspreadthenewsofourweddingplanstoherfamilyshemetwithsomeresistance.Hermother,Deborah,allalonghadbeensupportiveofourrelationship,andevenjokedaboutwhenweweregoingtogetmarriedsoshecouldhavegran
6、dchildren.Insteadofcongratulationsuponhearingournews,DeborahcounseledGailtobereallysureshewasdoingtherightthing.6“Soitwasallrightformetodatehim,butit’swrongformetomarryhim.Ishiscolortheproblem,Mom?”Gailsubsequentlytoldmeshehadaskedhermother.IntensiveStudy7“TostartwithImustadmitthatatfirstIha
7、rboredreservationsaboutamixedmarriage,prejudicesyoumightevencallthem.ButwhenImetMarkIfoundhimacharmingandintelligentyoungguy.Anymotherwouldbeproudtohavehimforason-in-law.So,colorhasnothingtodowithit.Yes,myfriendstalk.Someevenexpressshockatwhatyou’r