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1、英语演讲幽默开场白（HumorinEnglishspeech）Humorousspeech--ridiculeoneself(ChineseEnglishcomparison)Howdoesthespeakerlaughathimself?Asaspeaker,Igottwocomplaintsfromtheaudience:onewasthatIspokesoloudlythattheycouldn'tsleep;thesecondwasthatItalkedtoolong,andtheycouldn'tkeepawake.Asaspeaker
2、,I'veonlyhadtwocomplaintsfromaudiences.One,thatItalksoloudtheycan'tfallasleep.Andtwo,thatItalksolongtheycan'tstayawake.Innovativesentence:youorsleep,ornotsleep,aslongasnotsnoring,Iwillcontinuetospeak.Asaspeaker,hisspeechandLincoln'sspeechforColumbiaPetersburgafamousspeech[]co
3、mparison.Attheendofhisspeech,thereweresorrow,tearsandgrief-especiallytheplanningcommittee.Asaspeaker,hehasoftenbeencomparedtoAbrahamLincolndeliveringtheGettysburgAddress.Whenhefinisheshisspeechthereis,alsosorrow,tearsandmourningespeciallybytheprogramcommittee..Humorcommentary
4、:thespeakerspokesobadlythattheorganizerscriedverysadly.Attheend,thehostthankyoufromthebusyscheduletimeout-youkeepcool,gracefullynoddingandsmiling,knewtheonlythingonyourcalendarisalittlecoffeefrombreakfast.Poiseiswhenyoufinishyourspeechandthetoastmasterthanksyoufortakingtimeou
5、tofyourbusyscheduletobeapartoftheirprogramandyounodandsmile-graciouslyknowingfullwellthattheonlythingonyourcalendarisalittlecoffeefrombreakfast.Humornotes:someretiredcadreshavenothingtodoafterretirement,someoneaskshimtotakepartinsomeactivities,andhepretendstobebusy,andseemsto
6、pushalotofthingstocatchup.IusedtobenervouswhenIwasspeaking,butthenIsawamessagesayingthatifyouimaginealltheaudienceisnaked,itwillhelp.Atthismoment,Istoodhereandimaginedthattheaudiencewasnaked.Itworkedreallywell.Iwasn'tnervousanymore,butmyeyesweretired.Iusedtogetnervouswhengivi
7、ngaspeechbutthenIreadthatithelpstothinkoftheentireaudienceasbeingnaked.Andsoatthis,verymoment,Imstandinguphereimagining"everyoneinthisaudienceasbeingnaked.Anditreallyworks.Inosufferfromnervousness.Eyestrain.Yes.Humornote:thinkoftheaudienceasnaked,meaningI'mnotafraidofyou,notn
8、ervous.Mostpeoplearealittlenervouswhentheystandontheplatform.Ibelong
