高考英语读后续写备考：分析特色，沿袭语言风格

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高考英语备考：分析特色，沿袭语言风格读后续写的实质是根据所提供的原文内容，写出主旨一致、逻辑顺畅、语言风格一致的故事结尾。因此，续写时除了考虑故事的主题思想，特别关注逻辑之外，我们也要高度关注续写部分和原文的语言风格，确保我们写出的结尾在语言风格上和原文保持一致。然而在平时的续写练习中，我们发现很多同学忽略了这一点。具体表现为：1.用词太过复杂或偏僻。有些同学为了增加所谓的“高级词汇”，就刻意使用一些超纲的词汇。而很多情况下，这些同学只是大致了解这个词汇的汉语解释就去使用。岂不知，汉语解释很难和英语单词语义完全一致。我们如果要使用一个英语单词，一定要对其使用的语境有较为深刻的理解。如果我们只是对其汉语的词义有肤浅的了解就把它当作“高级词汇”来使用，往往会出现语义和语法上的问题。所以，老师的建议是，在写作中我们尽量使用课本中学过的单词。如果要使用超纲词，要记住以下几个原则：（1）注意不可过多使用课本外的词汇。（2）使用的课本外的词汇必须是自己对其使用语境非常清楚的单词，不要只凭借对单词词义的一知半解就使用“高级词汇”。（3）超纲词一定要在语境很明确的情况下再使用。2.“高级句式”太过集中。我们有些同学为了追求续写的“高级”，刻意地追求所谓的“高级句式”。本来用很简单的句子就可以表达清楚，却刻意使用复杂的句式，让句子结构累赘，反而影响了句意的表达。老师的建议是：（1）不可太过刻意追求“高级句式”的使用，要用在比较合适的语境中。（2）“高级句式”的使用不要太过集中，要注意使用的位置，注意文章段落结构的平衡和协调。文章的句子要长短结合。复合句和简单句交替使用。3.不注意原文句子和用词的风格，随心所欲。这样的续写和原文语言风格偏离，没有和原文协调一致。【名师导学】那么，我们如何才能写出和原文语言风格一致的文章呢？1.精读原文，理解文章要表达的主旨和思想。文字是为思想服务的，表达特定的思想需要相对应的有情感特色的文字。如果作者要褒扬特定的人或事，那么他就会用积极的文字。如果是贬低一个人或一件事，那么他就会用消极的文字。理解文章的主旨，对我们在续写中使用合适的语言有很大的指导意义。2.细品原文，分析原文的用词风格。要想对续写的文字有准确的把握，就要对原文的文字有非常准确的理解。要想准确理解原文文字的特点，就要在文章主旨的指导下，对原文的文字进行仔细的分析。对原文文字特点的分析包括：

1（1）对原文人物的动作和心理描写的分析。（2）对原文对话的话语特点的分析。（3）对原文场景的描写的分析。3.有机地组织自己的语言，保持和原文风格的一致。通过对原文主旨的理解和对语言的准确分析之后，我们就会对原文的语言特点有比较准确的把握，然后就可以使用和原文特点一致的文字来进行续写。【案例导引】Fiveyearsago，Ihadajobattheotherendofthecity，andIusuallycommuted（上下班往返）toworkbybus.Thoselongtiringhoursoftravellingwerealwaysannoying.Butoneday，itwashealing.Itwasanevening，andIgotonthebusthatwouldtakemehome.Ichoseaseatbythewindow，whichcouldpreventmefrombeingbotheredbyothers.Itwasnearly6：00pm，butthebuswasnotyetfullandthedrivergavenoindicationthatheintendedtogetthebusontheroadsoon.Minuteslater，amiddle-agedwomantookaseatbesideme.Itseemedthatshewascryingalltheway.Seeingherheartbreakingsituation，IaskedherwhetherIcouldhelpher.Shethankedmeandshookherhead.Thenshetearfullynarratedherstory.Shehadcometothecitytovisitherdaughter.Ontheway，athiefhadsnatchedoneofherbags，whichhadcontainedhalfofthemoneyshedbroughtwithher.Theotherhalfwasrolledinahandkerchiefandhiddenunderherblouse，soshefortunatelystillhadsomemoneyleft.Thebusconductor，thedriver，andotherpassengerslistenedtoherstory，butnoonesaidanything.Afterawhile，shestoppedcrying，removedsomecheesebreadfromherbag，andbegantoeat，worrystillknittingherbrow.Anoldmaninraggedclothesgotonthebus.Hesatintheseatjustinfrontofthewoman.Whenalltheseatsweretaken，thedrivergotbehindthewheelandstartedtheengine.Thebusconductorbegantocollectticketsandaskeduswhereweweregettingoff.Whenhecametotheoldman，thepoormanloweredhisheadnervously.Seeingthis，theconductoraskedthemantoshowhisticketinaloudvoice.Theoldmanadmittedinalowvoicethathedidnotbuyaticket.Heexplainedthathehadspentallhismoneythismorningwhenhe’daccidentallygotonthewrongbusandnowhewastryingtogohome.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右;2.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好。Paragraph1：

2Hearingthis，thebusconductororderedtheoldmantogetoffthebus.______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Thewomanseatedbehindtheoldmanwasalsoobservingtheincident._____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________主题语境：人与社会语篇类型：记叙文原文大意：作者在公交车上，看到一个非常伤心的中年妇女上了车。原来她来看她女儿，但是在路上一半的钱被偷了。后来又上来一位老人，他之前用身上所有的钱买了车票，却发现自己坐错了车，这导致他现在已经没钱买票了。主题思想：赞美丢钱的中年妇女的善良，批判司机和售票员的无情和冷酷，教育我们要善良，应帮助他人。[角色用词风格动作心理theauthorlongtiring;annoying;healing—烦恼的;得到慰藉thewomanheartbreaking;worrystillknittingherbrowcrying;thankedme;tearfullynarrated不幸的;伤心的thedriverandtheConductor—gavenoindication;saidnothing;inaloudvoice冷漠的;

3没有同情心的theoldman—inalowvoice;loweredhisheadnervously担心的;害怕的]从原文对各个人物的用词可以看出，对不同的角色，作者的用词都使用了不一样的风格。文章一开始作者用的是tiring、annoying，但是经过这件事后是healing，那么在续写的故事中，就应该体现出能使作者healing的情节。在描述中年妇女的时候，使用了表达不幸的词汇。但是，根据文章的主旨，这位中年妇女尽管不幸，但是很善良，因此，续写第二段就应该描述她善良的一面。用词风格都要向这个方向靠近。老人很不幸，那么在续写中对老人的描述也要使用表示不幸的、值得同情的词汇。而根据文章的主旨，司机和售票员是冷漠和没有同情心的代表，那么在续写的时候用词风格就应该和这个特点保持一致。Onepossibleversion：Hearingthis，thebusconductororderedtheoldmantogetoffthebus.Theoldmanwasalmostintearsashebeggedthebusconductortolethimtakethatbussohecouldgethome.Thebusdriver，whohadbeenlisteningtohisexplanation，stoodup，approachedtheoldman，andrepeatedtheconductorscommandtourgetheoldmantogetoffthebus.Apartfromtheharshwordsfromthedriverandsobsfromtheoldman，thewholebuswasinaterriblesilence.Thewomanseatedbehindtheoldmanwasalsoobservingtheincident.Whenthebusdriverandconductorraisedtheirvoicesattheoldman，shestoodupandsaid，“Don’tbesorudetohim！Can’tyouseehe’sonlytryingtogethome？”“Hedoesn’thaveanymoney！”thedrivershouted.Thewomanreachedinsideherblouse，tookoutherremainingmoney，andhandedittotheconductor.“Hereishisfare.Pleasebekindtoanoldman.”Later，shealsosharedherbreadwiththeoldman.Howmuchsweeterthejourneywaswiththewoman’skindnessandgraciousbehavior.续写文章语言特点分析：thewoman：“Don’tbesorudetohim！Can’tyouseehe’sonlytryingtogethome？”“Hereishisfare.Pleasebekindtoanoldman.”Later，shealsosharedherbreadwiththeoldman.这些话语和描述，充分表达了作者对这位女士的赞扬，和原文保持了高度的一致。thebusdriverandtheconductor：

4UrgetheoldmantogetoffthebusRaisedtheirvoices形象地表现了司机和售票员冷漠无情、毫无同情心的特征。theoldman：Theoldmanwasalmostintearsashebeggedthebusconductortolethimtakethatbussohecouldgethome.Sobsfromtheoldman续写中使用了tears、begged、sobs等单词来描述老人，表现了老人的不幸和可怜，和原文的语言色彩保持了一致。theauthor：Howmuchsweeterthejourneywaswiththewoman’skindnessandgraciousbehavior.描述作者心情的单词不多，但是这关键的一句和原文的开头形成了很好的照应。【模拟导练】阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。Upuntillastweek，Iwouldsaythatitwaswiseforyoutostayawayfromanunfriendlyperson.ButnowItakebackthat.Iwasgoingtoasportsandnaturecamp，andalmosteverythingaboutitwasfantastic：theactivities，thefood，theteachers，andalmostallofthekids.ThereasonwhyIsay“almost”isbecausetherewasagirl，Elizabeth，whowasalwaysfrustratedandseemeddeterminedtoruinthefantastictime.WhenIsawhersittingaloneintheburningsunatlunchoneday，Isaid，“Wanttojoinusunderthatniceshadytreeoverthere？”Elizabethsaid，“No，reallynot.”WhenweneededanotherpersonforourvolleyballteamandaboycalledJasperinvitedElizabethtoplaywithus，Elizabethsaid，“IfIwantedtoplayvolleyball，Idalreadybeplayingvolleyball.”Afterafewmoreunfriendlycommentslikethat，IdecidedtokeepawayfromElizabeth.Imean，ifshewantedtohaveaterribletime，thatwasonething.Buttherewereonlyafewmoredaysofcampleft，andIwantedtomakethebestofthem.Well，youknowhowjustwhenyoudecidetodothingsoneway，lifedecidestodothingstheoppositeway.Itsohappenedthatweweregoingonanaturehikeandourteacherpairedeveryoneupwithapartner.Guesswhomypartnerturnedouttobe！

5“Ican’tbelievehowwarmitis，”Isaid，tryingtomakesmalltalkaswestartedout.“Doyoulikehotdayslikethis？”“Ihonestlydon’tcareaboutthingsliketheweather，”Elizabethwhispered.Ismilednervously，tryingtothinkofanewtopic，“Whatdoyouliketodoforfun？”“Iliketowalkinpeaceandquiet，”Elizabethreplied.“OK，”Isaid.Later，wehadthequietest，andmostpeacefulhikeinthehistoryoftheuniverse，untilwemetabird.Itseemedthatthebirdwasinjuredandtriedtofleeintothegrass，butinvain.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右;2.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好。Paragraph1：Elizabethkneltdownbeforethebird._________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Seeingthescene，Elizabethsighedinrelief.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

6_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________参考范文Elizabethkneltdownbeforethebird.“Poorlittlecreature，”Elizabethmurmured，hervoicesoundinggentlerthanI’deverheard.“Hemusthavehadhiswingorfootinjured，justasmygrandpa.”“Yourgrandpa？Whathappenedtohim？”Iaskedconcernedly.“Heslippedandbrokehisfeetonthedaywhenthecampstarted.He’sstillinhospitalandsufferinggreatpains.”“Nowonderyouaresofrustrated，”Ithoughttomyself，observingthebirdsanotherattempt.Thebirdspreadhiswingsandfinallytookoff.Seeingthescene，Elizabethsighedinrelief.“Hemadeit！”“AndIbelieveyourgrandpawillbebackonhisfeetsoon，too.”Isaidwithafirmtone.Shenodded，smilingatmeforthefirsttime.Fromthenon，Elizabethbegantojoinmeinmyvarioustopics.Andmostofthetime，sheactuallyenjoyedmostofouractivitiesofthecampasmypartner.OnlythendidIrealizethatitmightbeworthgivingsomeoneasecondchance.Shemaybegoingthroughaterribletimeandjustdoesn’tknowhowtodealwithit.【评价导思】1.Elizabeth刚开始的情绪特点是什么？__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________2.原文用了哪些特征性的词和句子来表达Elizabeth的情绪？___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________3.续写的语言和原文中对Elizabeth的描述的对比：___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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