安徽省巢湖市春晖中学2020届高考英语 考前冲刺精品讲义外教旁批写作外教旁批写作 (4)

《安徽省巢湖市春晖中学2020届高考英语 考前冲刺精品讲义外教旁批写作外教旁批写作 (4)》由会员上传分享，免费在线阅读，更多相关内容在教育资源-天天文库。

1、安徽省巢湖市春晖中学2020届高考英语考前冲刺精品讲义外教旁批写作（五）典例请描述下面的漫画，讨论其含义，并表达你自己的观点。词数不少于120。________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2、________________________________【写作策略】1.仔细审题：(1)体裁：漫画。(2)时态：一般现在时。(3)人称：第三人称。2.确定结构：(1)简要描述图画。(2)解读现象，分析原因。(3)表达个人观点，提出解决问题的措施。3.筛选词汇：(countryside，poor，education，homework等。)4.句型搜索：(Thepicturesshowthat...；bebusywith；Asweknow等。)5.组句成篇：(therefore，so，but)【学生习作

3、】Thepicturesshowusthat①countrysidechildrenaretoopoortogotoschool.Incitiesmanychildrenwishthattheydidn’tgotoschoolanymorebecause②theyhavetoomuchhomework.③ThisistheeducationprobleminChina.Theeducationopportunityisnotequalindifferentplaces.Insomebigcities，chi

4、ldrenareverybusywiththeirlessonsinordertogotofirstclasscolleges.Theyaretired.④Theirfamilieshavealotofmoneyandwillsendthemtogoodcolleges.⑤Butinthecountryside，moneyisalittle.Therefore，manychildrencan’tgotoseniormiddleschool，⑥ofcourse，notcollege.SotheChineseg

5、overnmentshouldhelpthepoorpeopleandbuildmoreschoolsinthecountryside.⑦Childreninthecityshouldnotpaytoomuchattentiontohomeworkorscores.【名师点评】★语言及内容过于直白，平实；①可改为“countrysidefamiliescan’taffordschool...★②可改为：theburdenoftheschoolworkandfamilyexpectationistoomuch

6、forthem.★③典型的汉语思维方式，且态度略显消极。可修改为：Asweknow，oureducationsystemisnotyetideal.★④⑤⑥将条件好坏等同于钱的多少，容易引起拜金主义，价值观导向错误。④⑤可修改为：Insomerichcities，studentsarebusywiththeirstudiesatexpensiveprivateschoolswhileinthecountrysidemanychildrencan’tgotoseniormiddleschool，letalon

7、ecollege.★⑥汉语思维运用，可修改为：manychildrencan’tgotoseniormiddleschool，letalonethecollege.★⑦内容不合理。修改为：Studentsinthecitiesareallowedtohavelessworkload.★总体评价：本文总体上汉语思维运用过多，文章连贯性不够，且最后缺少总结性语言，但是没有明显地语法错