哈佛幸福课-08-perfection.ppt

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1、PerfeconismtiOutlineWhatisPerfectionism?CharacteristicsConsequencesSuccessandHappinessSourcesofPerfectionismOvercomingPerfectionismLearntofailorfailtolearnCrisis(WeiJi)DangerandOpportunity“Thegreatestmistakeamancanmakeistobeafraidofmakingone.”ElbertHubbardThePathofFailureAge22:LostjobA

2、ge23:DefeatedforstatelegislatureAge24:FailedinbusinessAge27:NervousbreakdownAge34:RanforcongressanddefeatedAge39:DefeatedagainAge46:RanforsenateanddefeatedAge47:DefeatedfornominationforvicepresidentAge50:DefeatedagainforsenateAge51:16thUSPresident“Freedomisnotworthhavingifitdoesnotconn

3、otefreedomtoerr.”MohandasGandhi“Theimportantworkofmovingtheworldforwarddoesnotwaittobedonebyperfectmen.”GeorgeEliotThomasWatsonSr.IBMAmyEdmondson(1999)“PsychologicalSafety”“Ifyouwanttoincreaseyoursuccessrate,doubleyourfailurerate.”ThomasWatsonSr.“OriginsofGenius”(Simonton,1999)Perfecti

4、onismisanincapacitatingfearoffailurethatpermeatesourlives,especiallythoseareasthatwecareaboutmost.Itisanapproach,acognitiveandemotionalschema,thatweholdtowardthejourneyofourlives,towardtheprocessofgettingfrompointAtopointB.PerfectionVs.ExcellenceCharacteristicsDefensiveOpentoSuggestion

5、sHalfEmptyHalfFullOverGeneralizeRealisticNoSelf-AcceptanceUnconditionalAcceptanceStaticDynamicPerfectionExcellenceFearoffailureFailureasfeedbackFocusonDestinationJourneyandDestinationPerfectionVs.ExcellenceConsequencesTemporaryReliefLastingSatisfactionInevitableFailurePossibilityofSucc

6、essWastestimeAppropriateTimeAllocationPronetodisordersHealthyApproachHurtsSelf-EsteemContinuousImprovementHarmsRelationshipsAllowsforGrowthAnxiety/StressCreativeTensionPerfectionExcellencePerformance?LessPainMoreGainLessPainMoreGain??*@#!!#??SustainableapproachtogrowthProcrastinationHi

7、gherlevelsofself-confidenceLearntofailorfailtolearn‘TheLuckFactor’(Wiseman,2003)Creativity(Simonton,1999)80/20Rule(Pareto’sPrinciple)Increaseinflowexperiences(Csikszentmihalyi,1991)SourceofPerfectionismConditioningDestination=Reward=AcceptanceJourney=Unrewarded=MeansOnlySocialenviron