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1、OnFriendshipBetweenMenandWomenOnFriendshipBetweenMenandWomen(AnExerciseintheOldStyle)292OnFriendshipBetweenMenandWomenPageSmithhaswrittenanamusingessayonthesubjectofthepossibilityofplatonicrelation-shipsbetweenmenandwomen(Smith,Page,“HeadOverHeelsinFriendship”,inComingofAg
2、e,SanFranciscoChronicle,“ThisWeek”,Sunday,earlySept.,1989).Hispointofdepartureistheclaimmadeinthemovie,WhenHarryMetSally,thatsuchrelationshipsareimpossiblebecausesoonerorlatertheybecomesuffusedwithsexualdesire.Smith’sargumentisthat,onthecontrary,theyarepossible,thathehasha
3、dsome104ofthem,thatthemerefactthatthequestionisraisedisasignofhowfarwehavefallenintheseliberatedtimes.Smithwriteslikethecomfortably-retired,happily-married,72-year-oldacademicheis.How-ever,thissubjectistooimportanttobelefttohappily-marriedprofessors.Itdemandsthedeeperandbr
4、oaderscrutinywhichonlyyearsinthefrontlinescanbring,especiallysincethesubjectofrelationshipsbetweenthesexes(which,ofcourse,includes,friendship)ismuchlargerandmorecomplexthanitusedtobe,asevidenced,afewyearsago,bytheBerkeleycommunewhicheachweekrequireditsmemberstoplaceonabull
5、etinboard,nexttotheirnames,acodeindicatingtheirsexualpreferenceforthatweek.Theoptionsincluded:celibate,masturbatoryonly,long-termmonogamous,short-term(orserial)monogamous,polygynous,polyandrous,heterosexual,homosexual,groupsexual,withthelastbrokendownintothesub-categorieso
6、ftwo-somes,three-somes,four-somes,etc.,andthen,withineachofthese,thedesiredmixofgenders.Buteventhisdoesnotexhaustthepossibilities,since,asmoststudentsofthesubjectknow,withineachsexualpreference,thereexistsacontinuumofpsychologicalgenders,e.g.,stronglymasculineheterosex-ual
7、,70-30masculine/feminineheterosexual,etc.Butabeginningmustbemade,soletusbeginbydividingthesubjectinto:(1)Friendshipwithinasexualrelationship;(2)Friendshipoutsideasexualrelationship.FriendshipWithinaSexualRelationshipAbriefdigression:Smithsayshecannottoleratethephrase“makin
8、glove”asasynonymforsexualintercourse,because,firstofall,“youcan’t‘make’love;itcomesunbidd
