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1、武松打虎剧本Wusongfoughtthetiger(好汉歌,dangerous,双截棍)第一幕:喝酒武松:Hello!IamWuSong.Themosthandsome,themostfamous,themostclevermaninLiangShan.IamgoinghometokillmysisterinlawPanjinlian!Shepoisonedmybrother.ItoldmybrotherPanjinlianwasdangerous.ButMybrotherstillmarriedher.(叹气,唉….跟音乐一起唱且跳舞)Dan
2、gerous,dangerous!Thegirlisdangerous.武松(见到酒店一家):Arestaurant!Good.Iamhungry.(进屋坐下)Waiter!Wine!Wine!Thebestwine!小二:Hi,sir.Sitdownplease.WouldyoulikeXO,ErGuoTou,MaoTai,orQingDaobeer?武松:(晕晕乎乎地)HowmuchistheXO?小二:1880(展示大瓶酒,醒目的标价)。武松:Open…Open…..(喷嚏)(小二将酒瓶起开)武松:(面怒,片刻无语)Openthewindo
3、wplease!Notthewine.Iwantsomeerguotou!It’sstrongenough.小二:You….You…..(敢怒不敢言,转身倒碗二锅头),Ok.Hereyouare.武松:Anythingtoeat?小二:Wouldyoulikesandwiches,hamburgers,bread,orpizza?武松:Tenpizzas,please.小二:Hereyouare!武松:(喝一口酒)Goodwine,verygoodwine!(小二上了两碗酒,武松喝了,却是不再倒了)武松:Iwantmorewine.Whynots
4、erveme?服务员!怎么不倒酒了?小二:Sir,MorepizzasOK,morewinenoway!客官,要比萨饼就给您,这酒就不添了。武松:(生气)Why?Ihavemoney!(扔钱倒桌上)掌柜:Look!(指着“三碗不过冈”牌子)。Thiswineisverystrong.Onebowl,comfortable.Twobowls,can’twalk.Threebowls,drunkandfall!,(叫店小二示范)喝一碗神清气爽,喝两碗保你浑身无力,喝三碗就立刻醉倒,最多喝保证你酒精中毒,命都没有了……武松:(喝一口,挤笑)Whoami
5、?WuSong!Even18bowlsisnothingforme.Givemewine!(咆哮,敲桌子)不是我狂妄,这酒劲虽大,可我绝对是应付得了,就是喝上十八碗也只是漱口而已,倒酒!掌柜:Butyoumustcallthisnumberfirst.(掏出手机,出示电话号码7474774,旁边注明棺材预订),ThenIwillserveyoumorewine.武松:(勉强同意,做打电话状)Hello!.......小二:Hereisyourwine.Butyourlastmeal,Ithink.你的酒来了!慢慢喝,估计是你最后一顿了。(武松冷哼
6、一声。一次次举起大碗,眨眼间十八碗酒就下了肚吃完了,拎着他的棍子就走)小二:Whereareyougoing,sir?武松:Jingyanggang去景阳冈后面的阳谷县。服务员:Oh,mygod.Youwanttodie?Thereisatigerthere.Ithaseaten30People.You’dbetternotgotoday.It’sdark.客官万万去不得!如今景阳冈上有只华南虎,天一黑就出来害人,已经害了三十几个人,官府限期叫猎户去捉,冈下都有广告,除了中午,都不能过冈,现在已经快天黑了,你不要命就去吧。我看你还是在我这里住一晚
7、最好。武松:(醉醺醺地)Atiger?I’llkillit!Look!Iamsostrong.IamgoodatKongFu!(秀肌肉,舞弄棍子,踢腿。)老虎?我要杀了它!看我有多壮!我的功夫多棒!掌柜:Youaredrunk.Don’tgo.看你这样子就知道你喝多了,怎么说起胡话了?可万万去不得!武松:(生气)Goaway!(摇摇晃晃走了)切,最讨厌人家小看我了,一边呆着去。掌柜:(摇头叹气)emituofo!Godblessyou!Amen!(阿弥陀佛,上帝保佑,阿门)第二幕:打虎(武松提着短棍,大着步,径向景阳冈走去摇摇晃晃地走了一段路,有
8、一只老虎跳出来)武松:Oh!Mygod!It’sarealmothertiger!(跪地求饶)Misstiger.letmego!Mym