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ID:13692951
大小:33.00 KB
页数:8页
时间:2018-07-23
《gregory's iphone contract老妈的iphone家规》由会员上传分享,免费在线阅读,更多相关内容在学术论文-天天文库。
1、Gregory'siPhoneContract老妈的iPhone家规 DearGregory, MerryChristmas!YouarenowtheproudownerofaniPhone.Hotdamn1)!Youareagoodandresponsible13-year-oldboyandyoudeservethisgift.Butwiththeacceptanceofthispresentcomesrulesandregulations.Pleasereadthroughthefollowingcontract.I
2、hopethatyouunderstanditismyjobtoraiseyouintoawell-rounded2),healthyyoungmanthatcanfunctionintheworldandcoexistwithtechnology,notberuledbyit.Failuretocomply3)withthefollowinglistwillresultintermination4)ofyouriPhoneownership. 1.Itismyphone.Iboughtit.Ipayforit.Iamloa
3、ningittoyou.Aren'tIthegreatest? 2.Iwillalwaysknowthepassword. 3.Ifitrings,answerit.Itisaphone.Sayhello;useyourmanners.Donoteverignoreaphonecallifthescreenreads"Mom"or"Dad".Notever. 4.Handthephonetooneofyourparentspromptly5)at7:30pmeveryschoolnight&everyweekendnig
4、htat9:00pm.Itwillbeshutoffforthenightandturnedonagainat7:30am.Ifyouwouldnotmakeacalltosomeone'slandline6),wherein7)theirparentsmayanswerfirst,thendonotcallortext.Listentothoseinstinctsandrespectotherfamilieslikewewouldliketoberespected. 5.Itdoesnotgotoschoolwithyou
5、.Haveaconversationwiththepeopleyoutextinperson8).It'salifeskill.Halfdays,fieldtrips9)andafterschoolactivitieswillrequirespecialconsideration. 6.Ifitfallsintothetoilet,smashesontheground,orvanishesintothinair10),youareresponsibleforthereplacementcostsorrepairs.Mowal
6、awn,babysit,andstash11)somebirthdaymoney.Itwillhappen;youshouldbeprepared. 7.Donotusethistechnologytolie,fool,ordeceiveanotherhumanbeing.Donotinvolveyourselfinconversationsthatarehurtfultoothers.Beagoodfriendfirstorstaythehelloutofthecrossfire12). 8.Noporn13).Sear
7、chthewebforinformationyouwouldopenlysharewithme.Ifyouhaveaquestionaboutanything,askaperson―preferablymeoryourfather. 9.Turnitoff,silenceit,andputitawayinpublic.Especiallyinarestaurant,atthemovies,orwhilespeakingwithanotherhumanbeing.Youarenotarudeperson;donotallowt
8、heiPhonetochangethat. 10.Donotsendorreceivepicturesofyourprivatepartsoranyoneelse'sprivateparts.Don'tlaugh.Somedayyouwillbetemptedtodothi
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