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1、The Shirt Collar 衬衫领子Therewasonceaperfectgentlemanwhosewholehouseholdgoodsconsistedofonebootjackandacomb.Buthealsohadoneofthemostremarkableshirtcollarsintheworld.I'lltellyouastoryaboutit.Whentheshirtcollarhadpassedhisprimeheturnedhisthoughtstomarriage.Inthefullnessoftimehewenttothewash,andthe
2、rehemetwithagarter."My!"saidthecollar,"anyonesoslender,sotender,soneatandniceasyouare,Ineverdidsee.MayIknowyourname?""No,"saidthegarter."Iwon'ttellyou.""Thenatleasttellmewhereyoulive?"askedthecollar.Butthegarterwassomodestthatshecouldn'tbringherselftoanswersuchanembarrassingquestion."Ibelieve
3、youareagirdle,"saidthecollar."Asortofunderneathgirdle.AndIdaresayyou'reasusefulasyouarebeautiful,myprettylittledear.""Iforbidyoutospeaktome,"saidthegarter."I'msureIhaven'tgivenyoutheslightestencouragement.""Yourbeautyiseveryencouragement,"saidthecollar."Kindlykeepawayfromme,"saidthegarter."Yo
4、ulooktoomasculine.""Oh,I'maperfectgentleman,"saidthecollar."I'veabootjackandacombtoproveit."Thiswasn'ttrueatall,fortheybelongedtohismaster,buthelikedtoboast."Pleasedon'tcomesoclose,"saidthegarter."I'mnotusedtosuchbehaviour.""Prude!"thecollarcalledherastheytookhimfromthewashtub.Theystarchedhim
5、,hunghimoverachairbackinthesun,andthenstretchedhimoutonanironingboard.Therehemetwithasadiron."Mydearlady,"saidthecollar,"youadorablewidowwoman,thecloseryoucomethewarmerIfeel.I'machangedcollarsinceImetyou,withoutawrinkleleftinme.Youburnclearthroughme.Oh,won'tyoubemine?""Rag!"saidthesadiron,ass
6、heflattenedhimout,forshewentherwaylikearailwayenginepullingcarsdownatrack."Rag!"waswhatshesaid.Thecollarwastheworseforwearattheedges,sothescissorswerecalledfortotrimhim."Oh,"saidthecollar,"youmustbeaballetdancer.Howstraightyoustretchyourlegsout.Suchagracefulperformance!Noonecandothatlikeyou."
7、"I'mwellawareofit,"saidthescissors."Youdeservetobenolessthanacountess,"saidthecollar."AllIhavetoofferismyperfectgentleman,bootjackandcomb.Oh,ifonlyIhadanearldom.""Idobelievehe'sdaringtopropose,"saidthescissors.Shecuthimsofuriouslythatheneverr
